I Need A Bigger Boat

Actually, I just need a boat. Something bigger than the bathtub. It is so soothing to be on the water and I am feeling the need to be soothed right now. Normally, some fried chicken or Bing cherries would do the trick, but I need to roll out the big guns. Bring on the baked potatoes and the Black Diamond Cheddar. Adulthood has its privileges and it also has its down side. Lately I have had more down side than privileges. Hence the need for a boat. And an outside cabin with a valet. I forgot about the valet. And a stocked bar with premium liquor and organic snacks. I never said I didn't appreciate privilege just that I wasn't in that lane right now.

The Natives are Restless

The babies have hatched. I think the birds are Eurasian Tree Sparrows. It is amazing how hard the parents work to feed the little ones. Both keep a watchful eye on their nestlings in their very dry and safe home. The infant chirping is a beautiful noise. It was crazy hot in Missouri today. I had the windows in the car rolled down and both air vents pointing on snoozing Edith on our way to work. It is summer!! The fireflies and frogs have had a big presence this spring and now summer. It is really fun around here right now. On my Spice bush shrub, I happened upon a very cool caterpillar. Actually, it was the mature larva of the Spice bush Swallowtail, the Papillo troilus. To top it all off, tonight while in the pool there were bats overhead. Life is good.

Tenderness

Yesterday my little protege and I were headed to Circus Flora and we cut through the Central West End. She was napping in the front seat while I drove, listened to NPR and watched the city roll by. I spotted two men standing within arms length of one another and one of them was clearly crying and was very upset. He did not appear hysterical, just heavy with sadness and his friend stepped forward slowly with his arms open and held and hugged his friend. I slowed down to watch in my rear view mirror, because I was so captivated by this truly tender moment between two men. It was so touching to witness the tenderness and emotional openness of the hugger. In a world filled with road rage, paranoia, concealed weapons and date rape drugs, I was reassured and comforted by the unexpected display of sincere kindness.

One of My Favorite Songs

When you're alone
And life is making you lonely,
You can always go downtown
When you've got worries,
All the noise and the hurry
Seems to help, I know, downtown

Just listen to the music of the traffic in the city
Linger on the sidewalk where the neon signs are pretty
How can you lose?

The lights are much brighter there
You can forget all your troubles, forget all your cares and go
Downtown, things'll be great when you're
Downtown, no finer place for sure,
Downtown, everything's waiting for you
(Downtown)

Don't hang around
And let your problems surround you
There are movie shows downtown
Maybe you know
Some little places to go to
Where they never close downtown

Just listen to the rhythm of a gentle bossanova
You'll be dancing with 'em too before the night is over
Happy again

The lights are much brighter there
You can forget all your troubles, forget all your cares and go
Downtown where all the lights are bright,
Downtown, waiting for you tonight,
Downtown, you're gonna be alright now
(Downtown downtown)

And you may find somebody kind to help and understand you

Someone who is just like you and needs a gentle hand to
Guide them along

So, maybe I'll see you there
We can forget all our troubles, forget all our cares and go
Downtown, things'll be great when you're
Downtown, don't wait a minute more,
Downtown, everything's waiting for you

Monkey Grinder

In my next job, I'll play a tambourine,

sell pink and blue wildflowers

and serve soup in a glazed terrine.

In my next job, I'll work part-time

and nap all afternoon.

In my next job, I'll take my feinting couch

and perfect a graceful swoon.

But right now my job is this one

and love it I really do

There is no end of people to help

there's always lots to do.

I have sprouted new gray hairs and sleep not so well. But I am so very happy to have a story to tell.

Annoyed In St. Louis

"A well regulated militia, being necessary to the security of a free state, the right of the people to keep and bear arms shall not be infringed." No where in there does it state that we have the right to show up in a public institution and open fire on innocent and unarmed people. The man who walked into the Holocaust museum with a shotgun was not a part of the militia except in his mind and had nothing to do with the security of our free state. Part of the reason the military works is because the soldiers work in concert with each other and under the direction of their commanding officer. Renegades, vigilantes and other mercenaries are a liability. Giving handguns to anybody who wants one because it is constitutionally allowed is irresponsible and puts citizens in harms way. I say if you want to join the military to protect our interests, enlist. I understand that you have a right to protect yourself and your property and that no doubt you are a responsible, non-violent human without a vendetta. However, I don't believe for one minute that people buying assault weapons, rocket launchers and armor piercing bullets give a damn about a renegade government.

Not a Real Issue

It has been very interesting to be a witness to all of the dialogue that has ensued following Supreme Court Nominee Sonia Sotomayor's reflection that: "I would hope that a wise Latina woman with the richness of her experiences would more often than not reach a better conclusion than a White male who hasn't lived that life." I did not find her comments offensive or racist and could really empathize with her observation. I believe she just meant she had a set of experiences that gave her a larger view of the world. I think any minority, be they Black, Cuban, Mexican, Jewish, female or disabled has a set of experiences that are uniquely theirs. That experience is often colored by the frequent reminders that we are different and not always valued for that difference. I know that to get through the daily gauntlet of inequality, suspicion and prejudice, minorities build strengths and skills based on our experiences as minorities. I don't read her comment as racist but more as a practical response to the hell I am sure she has experienced for being Latina in a country that has a history of seeing Latinas as interlopers, day laborers and low-riders. I don't think her views about her Latina heritage will diminish her ability to render judicial opinions in a fair manner.

One of the benefits of having made and maintained friendships is the support and insight we gain from each other. But sometimes I wonder if as friends we don't offer too much. Recently we had guests over and we had gathered in the dining room to say our thank yous and goodbyes before our company departed for the night. One of my guests commented on how a piece of artwork was too small for a particular wall. I said nothing. But I thought about it. What I mulled over, was why we feel the compulsion to correct or inform other equally mature and experienced adults. When we give advice we assume the listener is in need of a little education. Maybe not. Last night on NPR I heard an interesting story about a father and daughter. When the daughter was younger, the father incorrectly identified an amphibian as a frog and not a toad which prompted the daughter to launch into a lesson on the difference between toads and frogs. The father went on to illustrate stories for children about toads and frogs and the daughter has given herself credit for illuminating her dad about the differences between toads and frogs. Recently, she uncovered illustrated poems about frogs and toads that predated her precocious adolescence and her lesson on amphibians. She realized he was humoring her. Maybe our only role as friends is to hug, accompany, listen and appreciate life with your friend. I did not move the painting, nor do I plan to move the painting. I like it exactly where it hangs.

I Think She Likes It Here

This is Edith. A dog also formerly known as homeless, hungry and in need of a soft place to sleep. She is a very sweet dog but seems lethargic to me. She is scheduled for her spaying, but I wonder if I shouldn't wait until she is completely healthy. Believe it or not, she does have brief moments where she has a little pep in her step, but mostly when I change spots in the house. There is nothing effusive about Edith. What you see is what you get: napping Beagle. I miss Thelma every day. Edith could never replace Thelma a.k.a. "Flips, Flomma, Flam-Flam." I do think Edith appreciates her new digs. She has learned that she can get on the outside furniture with a boost. She deserves it.

Cherry Season

This is it!  It is almost summer and I can hardly wait. Cherries, peaches, Heirloom tomatoes, suntan lotion and endless barbecues.  Pedicured toes, gazpacho, guacamole and napping in the sun.  Nothing makes me happier than a July in Missouri: humidity, crazy hot days and the endless whirring of the fan. Enjoy it, summer is short.